You know those people right? The ones you look at like they’re crazy walking down the street with the forward facing camera on. The ones who get the media attention for it at baseball games. The ones who’s Instagram feed is covered with them. Well, I too am guilty of being “that girl.” I am the girl who has over 100 pictures in the selfies folder on her iPhone and I’m okay with that. We can think of a million reasons people take selfies, but for me, I have one: to create a memory. To stop time and save a moment when there is no one else around to do it for me.
Last Saturday I had to say goodbye to my best friend. My most loyal companion and the light of my whole world. It was the most devastating day of my life and it has hurt every day since. To feel close to him, to try to ease the pain as I figure out where to go from here, I scrolled through my phone at all the pictures I’d taken of him. There were dozens upon dozens and guess what a lot of them were… yup, selfies!
If I wasn’t “that girl,” I would not have captured the quiet moments at home, the mornings cuddles or the late night snuggles that made my relationship with my dog exactly what it was… a lifetime bond.
So no matter how many crazy looks I get, I will continue to take my selfies, I will create my memories and I will hold on dearly to the times I wish could last forever, because when they’re gone, I can always look back at them and smile
This is a message for you
Break ups are not easy and “breaking up” with someone who was never really yours to begin with I think makes it even harder, but sometimes we just have to let go. We can no longer hold on to the things that hold us down or drain the life out of us. As a girl, I feel that we tend to hold on longer than we should because we want an explanation. A reason for why it turned out the way that it did, but the truth is sometimes you aren’t going to get an answer. And even if you do it’s most likely not going to be the one you are looking for. It’ll probably leave you with even more questions that you already have. You loved him and you gave the relationship everything you could, but for whatever reason, it just didn’t work out. In the end we all have to learn that we can’t fix people. We can’t change them and we can’t make them feel something that they don’t. If they choose to walk away from you, let them go. There is nothing more that you can do and the energy it takes to try and fight to hold on to someone who is doing everything they can to push you away is just not worth it.
SO WHAT NOW?
Here you are, sad and your heart is broken. All you really want to do is grab a gallon of Edy’s ice cream and sit in your bed and cry while watching “The Lucky One” by Nicholas Sparks. Believe me, I’ve been there. We all have. But what good is that going to do? What satisfaction will that give you? Is he laying in his bed crying? No. Is he thinking about you right now? No. Does he miss you so bad it hurts? No. Because the harsh truth is this: if he was doing any of those things right now, he’d know where to find you. The only thing stopping him from being with you is himself. So instead of feeling sorry for yourself while he’s out living his life, my advice to you is this:
Take that anger, that sadness, that frustration and use it. Put it into something that will help you better yourself. Use the time you have by yourself to figure out who you are, what you want and what you deserve. Know your value and what you have to offer someone. Just because the last person didn’t see it, doesn’t mean the next person won’t, but you have to see it in yourself first before anyone worthy of it can have it. So wipe away those tears right now and put that gallon of ice cream back in the freezer, put on some makeup and a cute spring outfit and pull yourself together. The next guy is out there somewhere and he’s not gonna be able to find you if you’re lying in your bed with Nicholas Sparks.
Stay strong, love yourself, know what you deserve and don’t settle for anything less!
Happy Monday Friends!