Browsing Tag

inspiration blog


Embrace the Now

I can’t believe that more than half of 2015 has already passed. Time really does fly by when you’re having fun. Lately I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about life and all the plans I’ve been making. October is going to be an exciting month for me, I have a lot of travel plans and get to see some of my dearest friends. I’m really looking forward to it, because I feel like I spent a lot of September wishing.

I wished for the moment when I’d finally find “the one.”

I wished for the moment when I would find the job of my dreams.

I wished for next summer and a cross country road trip I’m thinking about taking

I wished for the day I might get married and start a family

But, then I realized, as wonderful as all of those things would be, that when I wish for them to come, when I wish for those days, that I am wishing away all the time and memories in between. Getting married and having a family means one day I’ll have to say goodbye to this beautiful little townhouse of mine that I’ve worked so hard to decorate and make my own.

Finding “the one” means even though we’ll create memories of my own, I’d have to say goodbye to spontaneous friend vacations, me trips and waking up and being selfish and doing for Courtney 100% of the time. And to be honest, right now, I’m not ready to do that. I like my life the way it is right now.

And wishing for my road trip to come now means speeding through the holidays, professional cheerleading season, coaching my little ones through cheerleading and all the fun, exciting things that may happen along the way.

Yes, someday is fun to think about. And it is fun to hope for, but we never know when it may come, so until then, I have to remember to cherish what I do have and love my life for what it is now, not tomorrow.


You Have Always Been Enough

For those of you who may not be aware, this week is National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. I’m writing this post because I think it’s important for people to understand that an eating disorder is not a choice. It is not a phase. But most of all, I am writing this post for those who continue to fight this battle because if my story can give just one person the courage to ask for help, it is worth sharing.

They say that sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you. I beg to differ. Words are a very powerful weapon. They have the ability to cut deeper than any stick or stone ever could. Once they are said, they live on in your mind, body and soul long after they’ve rolled off of someone’s tongue. A long time ago someone once told me that I would never be good enough. That no one would ever love me for who I was. Those words have haunted every part of me for the last 4 years. They changed the way I saw myself. The way I believed in myself and the way I loved myself.

Food became a chore and the mirror my enemy. I became obsessed with trying to meet someone else’s version of “good enough.”  I cannot even remember at what point it all spiraled so far out of control I never thought I would find my way back. There were times I spent crying and praying that I would find the strength to get through it, but I couldn’t. I remember vividly the nights that my heart was pounding so hard that I would promise God that if he just let me wake up the next morning I would try harder. And when I did wake up, it was the same thing all over again. A vicious cycle I just couldn’t get a hold of.

It wasn’t until I realized that trying to fight a war by yourself was impossible. I would never win. An army of one was not enough. With a lot of work, I have learned that life’s struggles, no matter what they might be, are not something to be ashamed of. That asking for help is not a sign of weakness. Once I began to put trust in others I was able to grow a support system I didn’t really know existed. It allowed me to break down walls, learn to trust people again and understand that no one deserves to hold that kind of power over me. That the only person that needs to love me… is me. The only person I need to be good enough for is myself. That once I was capable of that, the rest would all fall into place.

It’s a journey I’m still on. A battle I’m still fighting. Some days the road is smoother than others, but my good days far outweigh my bad and through it all I continue to remind myself that I am enough. That I have always been enough. That anyone who is capable of telling me that I am not, is not worth my time or my energy. We all have the strength deep down inside to do anything we put our minds to. If we want it bad enough we will triumph. So no matter where you are in your journey know that it is okay to ask for help. Keep fighting, keep believing and never give up. And always always remember: YOU ARE ENOUGH.peterpan

  ‘At any given moment, you have the power to say that this is NOT how the story is going to end’


4 Types of Friends Who Make Your World a Better Place

Last week was my birthday and thanks to all of my friends and their grand plans, I celebrated all week long! There was a little line dancing, concert adventure, celebration dinner times two and a cookie cake to top it all off. I enjoyed every minute of it and am so very thankful for the people in my life who made turning 31 a little less scary. That was my inspiration for today’s blog. I thought about all the people in my life and how each and every one of them plays a very different role.

It’s almost like a puzzle, I wouldn’t be complete if each of them wasn’t here. So today I’m giving tribute to girlfriends both near and far. I’m raising a nice chilled glass of sweet Moscato wine to the ones we could never live without:

She’s Rough Around the Edges: She doesn’t sugarcoat anything. If you don’t want to hear it, it doesn’t matter because she’s going to tell you anyway. She’s the friend who will keep you honest. She’ll keep you on the straight and narrow and when you veer off the path just a little bit, she’ll be right next to you to jerk the wheel back in the right direction. So don’t get angry when she doesn’t sympathize with you. Don’t get upset because she doesn’t feel sorry for you. Thank her for making you a stronger person. For showing you that excuses will get you nowhere and that a self proclaimed pity party can only last for so long before you need to put on your big girl panties, suck it up and get back out into the world.

She’s Always Your Last Call: She thinks of you all the time. She sends random messages to let you know that. You don’t talk every day, but in all those years she’s been your friend, she’s never let you down. She’s always been there when you need her. When you cry, she cries with you. When you are broken or hurting, she feels it too. When it’s 3am and you just need someone to talk to, she’ll be there. It doesn’t matter if she just fell asleep twenty minutes ago because her child finally did or she’s had a bad day of her own, if you need her, she’ll be there. Just like she’s always been because that is what she does. Even though physically she may not always be able to be there for you, she is the girl who walks with you, step by step, each and every day while you cross canyons and climb mountains. She is the friend who throws rocks at those who hurt (metaphorically speaking of course) and is ready to put up a fight against anyone who dares cross you. She is the one that will show you that real, true friendships do exist. That lifelong bonds can survive silence, distance and everything in between.

She Just Gets It: There was a time in her life when she was right where you are now. Whether going through  heartbreak, a life changing event or a midlife crisis, she understands you more than anyone else at the moment. She doesn’t judge you for the choices you make or the way you live your life. She lets you be free, run wild and even comes along for the ride. She knows exactly what you need to do in order to find yourself and accept your situation. She guides you slightly from time to time to make sure you don’t completely fall off the cliff, but for the most part, she lets you do your thing. She’s the only one you can talk to about how you feel and what you’re going through and although she knows you probably won’t take any of her advice, she gives it to you anyways. She’s the one you look to when you lose hope. She makes me you have faith in brighter days. Her strength, her loyalty and her companionship prove that good people do exist.

She’s Wgirlfriendsild and Reckless:  She takes you out of your comfort zone and challenges you to try things you’d never do on your own. Your feet are barely ever on the ground when you’re with her because she’s always moving so fast, but that’s okay. Sometimes you need a timeout in life and she’ll be the one to give it to you. After a rough day at work, a fight with your significant other or when the stress of everyday life becomes too much, she’ll help lift your spirits and break you out of that funk with an all night extravaganza that will help you leave all your worries behind and find your inner party girl you forgot even existed. You need her to remind you that life shouldn’t always be taken so seriously. That a little bit of fun never hurt anyone.